Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Psalm 104:14-15

Thou dost cause the grass to grow for the cattle, and plants for man to cultivate, that he may bring forth food from the earth, and wine to gladden the heart of man, oil to make his face shine, and bread to strengthen man's heart.
Oh yes, God brings grain from the land, wine to make people happy, their faces glowing with health, a people well-fed and hearty.

This is a "Hymn to God the creator."   God provides creation with everything it needs and then goes beyond that to provide the means of gladdening and strengthening our hearts.  My heart needs gladdening and strengthening.   There is one means God uses that I have trouble appreciating:  time.  I want my heart gladdened and strengthened like it's a product and not a process.  I want my heart glad and strong for good.  There are verses about time in this psalm: the day, the night, and the seasons.   Time is God's creation and it is a means to gladden and strengthen my heart.

Lord, let me appreciate the time you provide for me to heal from depression.  Let me pay attention to the ways you gladden and strengthen my heart.  Amen.  


Thursday, September 24, 2015

Psalm 103:6

The Lord works vindication and justice for all who are oppressed.
God makes everything come out right; he puts victims back on their feet.

There are a lot of fitting verses in this psalm.  Bless the Lord who forgives sins, heals diseases, redeems you from hell, and many more.  I chose this one because in Psalm 102 I was brought to my knees, so it seems important to know that I will be put back on my feet.  See, I told you a few psalms and a few years ago that I was over the depression and here it is back again.   The lessons I learned have to be learned again, and again, and again.  I'm not starting from scratch, though.  I now see the signs earlier and take care of myself a little better and, so far, avoid the major depression I experienced before.   I will find myself back on my feet.

Lord, you bring us to our knees to teach us the lessons we need to learn.  Please use these lessons to bring me back on my feet, living the full life you intend for me.  Amen.

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Psalm 102:23

He has broken my strength in mid-course; he has shortened my days.
God sovereignly brought me to my knees, he cut me down in my prime.

When is it time to keep fighting, and when is it time to give up?  This verse makes me think of the adage, "When God closes a door, he opens a window." Good old Merriam-Webster says a sovereign is "one that exercises supreme authority..."  The problem is, some of us are not so good at discerning where God's supreme authority is leading us.  I am not so good at discernment period.  In other words, there's not a window in sight!  The God I trust does not bring me to my knees just to exercise his supreme authority.  I don't know where that window is, or where it leads, but maybe I'll see it when I stop banging on the door.

Lord, my strength is broken.  You have brought me to my knees.  Let me trust in your love for me and discern your path for me.  Amen.

Monday, September 21, 2015

Psalm 101:2

I will give heed to the way that is blameless.  Oh when wilt thou come to me?  I will walk with integrity of heart within my house; 
I'm finding my way down the road of right living; but how long before you show up?  I'm doing the very best I can, and I'm doing it at home, where it counts.

This is a psalm about justice, and justice begins at home.  It is difficult to balance treating depression with family, friends, and work.  Here I am, an introvert with depression.  I need to be alone to recharge.  I've hit a point in my life where my energy is limited and I'm no longer able to keep plugging along without risking a relapse.  So where should my energy go?  Work?  Relationships?  This verse says home is where it counts, a definite vote for relationships.  Yet I'm in a profession that requires a lot of energy, and home is more forgiving than work.  Nevertheless, this verse says the scale should tip in favor of relationships.

Lord, a balanced life is so difficult to achieve.  Bless my attempts at discerning your word and your will for me.  Let me always remember to do the very best I can at home, where it counts.  Amen.